Zoo Replaces Dead Polar Bears With Fakes
W
hen you have an issue with your polar bears dying why not replace them with fake bears. I mean that's what we did with my aunt. We replaced her with a fake bear. No one noticed.
Ok but seriously this brings up an important question. How many of those animals you see in the zoo have been made into anamatronics. Zoo Disney anyone?
Googling Fights Dementia
Saving the world since 1996
In a recent study, scientists have found that googling stuff on the internet actually encourages blood flow and a healthy brain. This is yet another reason why I love Google, it is making people healthier.
Before we had a search-based internet, everyone would put in a specific site that they wanted to access which provided them a service. When Google came around they emphasized finding information instead of providing a service and radically changed the internet. Now Google is a verb. It doesn't matter what search engine you use, Google has likely affected how you perceive the internet. Beyond that, it has affected how I use all computers. I don't worry about organizing applications because I just a key combo on my keyboard and search for the application.
This constant searching apparently has benefits beyond making information and services easier to find. Every time you think about finding something new, or just surf the internet, you are constantly making small decisions and problem solve for solutions. Deciding how to phrase a search to return the best results requires some thought.
the study showed that using Google to find information stimulated the same parts of the brain, and in a similar way, as solving a sudoku puzzle or starting a new hobby. The difference here is that you are constantly finding NEW information. Every new search is just that, brand new. Doing sudoku puzzles for an hour a day to me would seem much more draining and would get boring much faster than googling things for and hour a day.
Moral of the story is that those Bing commercials asking what searching has done to us are absurd. Searching isn't a problem, it is a brain workout. By searching all the time we are keeping our brains healthy and fighting dementia.
Found photo details electronics shopping in the late 1800s
Eager consumers gather for the midnight release of a new product called "the light bulb."
Cleverpork Central is proud to bring you a recently discovered photo of retail giant Best Buy's predecessor: Supreme Purchase.
According to documents attached to the photo, the oft-forgotten chain primarily sold telegraphs -- strange metal machines that allowed the transmission of what we might today call "text messages." Cell phone towers had terrible coverage back then, because they simply didn't exist.
Study Reveals Pittsburgh Unprepared For Full-Scale Zombie Attack
It is Zombie Week here at Cleverpork Central. We let the dead rest for a week after Halloween, but now they're back with a vengeance. Keep your eyes open for more undead content through the week.
In an October study done by the Pittsburgh mayor, and only reported by a single news source, it was determined that the city fo Pittsburgh is not ready to fight the coming waves of the zombie horde. Truth is, all of their preparedness policies were made before current zombie research was made. The article states, "The city's emergency safe houses, established by a city ordinance in the early '70s, lack even the most basic fortifications for zombie invasion." and that is just one example.
Giant Squids, Now more Dangerous than Ever
Osaka, Japan
Japanese scientists researching kelp in the waters of the Pacific Ocean survived an attack from a giant lazer squid, sustaining major damage to the crews deep sea science floaty-down machine from the squids 'beak lazers'. If not for the quick maneuvering of Dr. Akiko Toyota, as well as the on board 'white-out' lazers, the scientists would have not survived the attack.
Squids and Lasers
Once thought to be reclusive animals, the attack on the Japanese scientists marks the fifteenth giant lazer squid attack to take place in the last six months. This sudden increase in frequency of attacks has lead many in Japan and in countries around the Pacific to plead with their governments to declare war on the lazer squids. Hitomi Nintendo, a local Osakan fishermen and frequent traveler of 'the ink blot' (the portion of the Pacific that is the habitat of the giant lazer squids), is the head of Permanent Extinction Now In-terms of Squids, "PENIS is a group on the rise. Our message is perfectly straight and not bent to one side of the issue or the other, we want the nation of Japan to declare war on these murderous squids and eradicate them from the earth. To long have travelers of the Pacific shriveled in fear or shrunken up at the thought of encountering such beasts! At least 1 out of every 5 voyages into the Pacific wont even get off this year! That's sad, and devastating to the Psyche of the captains of the ships. Sure one could say it happens to a lot of captains, and statistically that's true, but if all that is in the way of getting off and rising to the sea is a lazer shooting sea monster than I say we kill those monsters dead!"
McDonalds Monopoly vs. Powerball vs. Nature
Well I don't know about you all but when it is Monopoly season at McDonalds I get kind of excited. I always figured there could be a chance at winning some cash! Well I think I was mistaken...
| Game | Payout | Odds | $/Odds |
| Monopoly | $1,000,000 | 1 in 542,034,000 | 0.00184490 |
| Monopoly | $50,000 | 1 in 640,586,000 | 0.00007805 |
| Monopoly | $25,000 | 1 in 320,293,000 | 0.00007805 |
| Monopoly | $10,000 | 1 in 427,058,000 | 0.00002342 |
| Monopoly | $5,000 | 1 in 256,235,000 | 0.00001951 |
| Powerball | Jackpot (Minimum $10,000,000) | 1 in 195,249,054 | 0.05121664 |
| Powerball | $200,000 | 1 in 5,138,133 | 0.03892464 |
Well that is interesting - who would have guessed you have better odds playing the lottery. Infract you are about 2.7 times more likely to win the Powerball jackpot than to win the $1M at McDonalds. Gee looks like if you are interested in cash your better stop eating those Big Macs and head across the street to 7-11 for a Powerball ticket.
But then again if you want to put that statistic to to the test the probability of being in a plane crash is 1 in 11,000,000. Oh and the chances of dying in a car crash are around 1 in 5,000. So lets see 17.7 times more likely to be in a plane crash than win the Powerball Jackpot and 39,049.8 times more likely to die in an automobile accident than win the Powerball Jackpot. Well I know what your saying now - I don't ride planes or cars - well if you want a nature perspective the probability of being struck by lighting is 1 in 280,000 which is 697.3 times more likly than the Powerball Jackpot and if you compare that to Monopoly ($1M) you are 1,935.8 times morre likly to get fried.
So in conclusion - Good Luck
Trademarks not used with permission. Odds and payouts found at the following links.